You really can’t predict who is ready
Mine is a story of learning from failure.
Many years ago in a semi-rural setting while living across from two neighbors, we focused on befriending one of the families — a traditional family, great kids, values oriented, their daughter was a great babysitter for us, and we developed a good friendship. We were surprised that over the years they never accepted our friendly invitations to participate in our faith or church activities, in spite of a good relationship. We remained friends.
Next to them lived a family where the father was an alcoholic, where disputes and yelling were frequent, where the older daughter proved to not be a reliable babysitter, and where in general things were always chaotic.
Long story short: the wife/mother of the chaotic family asked her home daycare provider about a picture of the temple in her entry way, and she and her kids joined the church. The husband/father never did, and in fact divorced his wife, who remarried a member of a bishopric in a nearby town in the temple. The younger children remained active and went to BYU. We became good friends of the family before they moved away, and we were blessed for knowing them — once we saw in them what our Father saw in them.
So we made assumptions about who was “ready and likely” to hear the gospel and totally ignored the family that was most ready — and wanted it most.
As I read about not judging or assuming who is ready in the book today, this story that has haunted me over the years jumped into my mind, and I thought I would share it so it can help others — and perhaps as a bit of penance for my past judgment.
I am working hard now to assume that ANY person might be the one the Lord wants me to invite, no matter what other first impressions I might have about them.
-David. Oregon
July 29, 2013 Uncategorized
Wow, David. This line of yours hit me hard: “Once we saw in them what our Father saw in them.” That’s the beauty of all this. Seeing people the way God does and treating them that way until even they get how great they are. That’s ministry and missionary work!
I get the memory of having judged them is still with you. It always will be, yeah? We rarely forget completely. And I think you are whole and in good standing with God now! You gave up your judgments and started supporting them as they were taught and continued to live from a world of new judgments — love, friendship and compassion — over the years by being a friend and taking interest in the family’s kids. I’m inspired!!
I think you’re great and that you can live without any lingering haunts or guilt! I’m on your team — to set aside all first impressions and invite without assumptions 🙂
Thank you for sharing this!
That’s a great article. Many years ago before joining the Church, my quest for truth, happiness and understanding life’s purpose took me down a path of drugs, immorality and alcohol abuse. One day I sat in a dental hygienist’s chair at the local Community College. The student hygienist asked me what I knew about the Mormons. With a captive audience, she proceeded to tell me about a boy named Joseph Smith and his efforts to understand his life’s purpose. He finally called out to God, who appeared to him with his Son, Jesus Christ. Heavenly Father brought forth the Book of Mormon through the boy Prophet.
I read the Book of Mormon. God spoke to ME in a way I couldn’t deny. My search was over and my life was transformed through Jesus Christ.
Several years later I saw her again. She came to visit us after we named our fourth child after her. I asked her if she shared that story with everyone. She said, “No, but you seemed so lost. You seemed like a good person who was going down some bad paths.” I had gone down some bad paths. I wish I hadn’t. I should have known better. It took years to recover from it. The Miracle is that she didn’t prejudge me. She shared the message of the Restoration and my life was changed forever.
I am so glad she didn’t prejudge me and find me not worthy or likely to embrace the Gospel. We never know who God has prepared.
I love this Gospel. I love my family. I am so grateful for my Savior who literally saved me from a life of sin, sorrow and despair. A side note is because she shared the wonderful message with me, my life was transformed. Both of my brothers joined the Church, served missions, married in the temple and have wonderful families. My wife and me are happier than we can imagine, with the peace of Christ carrying us through every life trial. Four of our children served missions (some sending letters of gratitude from their missions to the missionaries who taught us). And the Lord has twice given me the privilege of serving as bishop.
I hope we will be careful not to prejudge anyone. The Lord knows who is prepared and will let us know if we are willing.
We should be throwing out invitations to meet with the missionaries every day. Yesterday I prayed for the opportunity. Grabbing a chicken sandwich at McDonald’s, I knew the Lord wanted me to share. I asked the lady if she ever saw Mormon missionaries coming through. She said, “No, but I see them on the street!” I said, “Maybe you could ask them to share their message with you some time. It’s a wonderful message.” She smiled and said, “Okay!”
By the way, our ward is putting together a “Testimony Book” for the members to get back in a testimony bearing frame of mind. The members will get to know each other better and the missionaries can use them with selected contacts.
Love this idea of the Testimony Book — agree that it’s a great way for people to connect. Tell us how it goes!